The mythology of goal-setting seduces you. It tells you you can engineer your fulfillment through identifying what you want, making a plan to achieve it, and then executing on the plan. But the happy ending that comes once the goal is achieved quickly dissipates. Your restless dissatisfaction returns.
It seems the only option is to set yet another goal, a bigger one.
This is especially true at midlife. Achieving goals used to be so satisfying, when you were younger. Getting a new job, dating a new person, buying a new house — these are thrilled achievements the first, second, and maybe even third time it happens.
Eventually the thrill goes away.
You begin to pursue the atelic (activities that are process-oriented not goal oriented) rather than the telic (activities that are goal oriented.
At midlife, you stop relying on goals to give your life meaning. You find joy in being present, in connecting with people you love, in creating good things in the world.
Today, I set down my goals. I make an intention to be present, to find connection with other people, and to express who I am becoming.